I'm looking for a honest woman
And though depression is still haunting me, Im still a big fan of life and living and all that good stuff.
What they also dont tell you is that everyone deals with this.
I have done myself a disservice.
Im not going to end this blog with some cheesy" or self-help speechand Im not going to apologize for anything Ive written here, either.This is the underbelly of singleness.And you find yourself in this weird place of not drowning in Depression, but feeling pretty crummyand being Tired enough to not have an ounce of energy to do mature dating south africa anything about.Youve succeeded to live another month without getting pregnant.But here I am, still battling.Theres no shame in trying.If I dont look for the silver liningwhat is the purpose to the bad things that happen?!The secular world says superficially.Illustration by, meghann Stephenson.
I never meet guys.
I feel vaguely useless and sorry that my husband has to have blood drawn so often, and I feel like a huge asshole because every time I hear that someone else is pregnant, my heart kind of tenses up and I start to tear and.I got hit on regularly.Why do I SAY Im still single?You just need more faith, the Christian world says judgmentally.And then you get what they mean when they say, Were trying.And then, one day, you decide youre done with contraceptives.I want to be that woman, but Im not that woman yet.And you dont quite understand what they mean by trying (high school effectively taught us that you can practically get pregnant from a member of the opposite sex so much as glaring at you, so be safe but you do it anyway.Not dodging it or covering it up or glossing over it to make it look prettier and more pleasing so you can prop it up in the corner and not have to deal with.
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